Day 126: "One Groovy Coconut," My Ass

Today, I broke open a coconut with my bare hands, but it still turned out to be a bust.

I found this little gem in Kroger and thought to myself, "Well, I've never opened a coconut before!" And, to boot, it had this little tag: "One Groovy Coconut." My heart fluttered with possibility.

 I brought my prize home and photographed him looking ever-so exotic. I brought him outside to a the curb and just went for it, banging on the concrete corner as if I were a monkey cracking forest seeds and nuts with a rock. After only a minute or so, and with little effort and no fanfare, it broke open into this...

...a no-milk, moldy, rotten, untouchable, inedible coconut.

Thanks Kroger. 


  1. i just cracked open a coconut brought from the market, and it turned to that piece of sh*!

  2. Just bought one from Lowes foods and the same! Disgusting!