Day 140...or is it 141? Tales from taking the Red-Eye

Because my boss is openly, self-proclaimedly as cheap as they come, he refused to let me stay one minute past my client billable time in San Diego. For me, this meant that the convention closed for the day on Wednesday, we went out for dinner, and then went promptly to the airport for my 10:30 PM flight back to Atlanta.

I had a 5-hour flight to Charlotte, combined with a 3 hour layover in Charlotte, and 35 minute flight back to Atlanta. I left SD and arrived in Atlanta at 9:30 AM, spending the whole night on a plane or in an airport.

This is called a red-eye, because all the people who get suckered into this cheap flight can't possibly sleep restfully on a plane (at least in coach), so they all come out with red eyes. I thought it was just a cultural term until I pulled into the Charlotte airport, went to the bathroom and noticed that my eyes were in fact as red as they could possibly be. I would have taken a picture but I have a little more self-respect than that.

But take my word for it that I looked JUST LIKE Natalie Portman in Black Swan:

On the flight, I was seated next to a couple who was clearly very "new," so they were kissing each other repeatedly and doing the whole high-pitched fake arguing thing...

Girl: "Why do you not like when I wear a pink hair tie??"
Boy: "Aw, babe you know I just think your hair is best complimented by a green hair tie."
Girl: "Babe, I just ran out of those, but I'll by them just. for. YOU!"
Boy: "You are the sweetest and cutest girlfriend EVER with your pink hair tie, I take it back!"
Girl: "AWWWWWW"

Leah: *moans audibly while perhaps saying something to the effect of shuttheeffupandtakeittothebathroomyoufreakycutefreaks*

Taking a red eye was pretty freaking awful, cute, cuddly couple excluded. I can't sleep on airplanes, no matter how many drugs I take. Thus, upon my return to Atlanta, I crawled into bed and slept from 11:00 AM to 5:30 PM, and again from 11:30 PM to 7:30 AM. That's 14 hours, if you're into counting.

I am STILL messed up from all of this. You'd think I'd get the day off today, and you'd be partially right. I'm technically in the office, but I'm jamming to Pandora, updating the blog, and catching up on gossip.

Does this all make sense? If not, just read the past couple of posts and try to put the pieces together for yourself.